25 Takeaways from Living a Quarter of a Century
When you’re in your twenties, turning 26 is a real pill. It’s over the hill. You’re now MORE than half way from 20 to 30, and 30?! Thirty is just scary.
If you’re like me, by the time you pass 25, you’ve experienced heart break, tragedy, a little work experience, travel, and whole lot real life #ADULTINGcrap. I may still be a child to many, but hey, I do feel like I’ve grown “a tad” wiser in my last 25 years on Earth.
2017 was definitely the YEAR where I discovered who I truly am, and I’m excited to share with you what I learned and how I got there.
ONE : ASSUMED CONSENT
If you want to be somebody, if you have a dream of accomplishing something, if you know what you want… ACT like you can do it. Show up with confidence. If you enter into a room like you are supposed to be there, then guess what, people will believe that you ARE supposed to be there. When I finally left finance and began to label myself as a CREATIVE, a Content Creator, I had virtually NO clients who used me for it. I made business cards and started networking. I went to evening meet ups and when people asked what I did for a living, I responded with “I create content for small businesses. I’m a videographer, photographer, and designer who helps plan and implement social media strategies.” People would occasionally ask to see my work, tell me about their own businesses and how I might be of use to them, and the tables started to turn for me.
The biggest advances in my career have not been at those networking meetings though… it has been in my own close network of people. We all know that word-of-mouth is the strongest and most effective way to sell products or services. Well, even the people in my life that I was close to… were withholding ideas, connections, and information because I was branding myself as a financial advisor and not as a creative. The second I changed that around, things not only clicked for me… they clicked for my friends and family. Long story short, if you want to be somebody, act like you ARE that somebody.
TWO: BUILD LONG TERM RELATIONSHIPS WITH DIFFERENT KINDS OF PEOPLE
There are people in my life that are unconventional, random, odd relationships for me to have. One is a 55 year old lady in PR, one is a 45 year old currency trader, one is a 70 year old lawyer, one is an old coworker who I adore. Although I enjoy being around these people and none of them are means to an end… they are not my typical friend. I seek to provide value and friendship for each one of them, expecting nothing in return. HOWEVER, SOME DAYwhen shiz hits the fan, I need a connection, an idea, a job, a florist, a freaking massage… you name it!, I know that these folks will bend over backwards to help.
I am building a mirage of strong, long term relationships that are incredibly valuable to me.
I challenge you to step outside of your comfort zone and spend quality time with unusual people where you can start the long, slow sell.
THREE: COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS
There is truly nothing worse than the phrase “you don’t know what you got til it’s gone.” BUT it is all too true. This notion has pressed me to be grateful for what I have, spend time with people that I care for, and to never take ONE breath for granted. This may seem obvious, but when you’ve been through the ringer… it starts to sink in on a whole ‘nother level. I get anxiety when I don’t see my grandma for more than 2 weeks. I want to soak up as much time with her as I can. I spend as much time with my brother as possible, as I lost my other “brother” Griffin, and I realized just how precious time with family is.
Even when life feels absolutely dreadful, know that there are so many things to be thankful for… and that it will all be okay!
FOUR: LISTEN TO PODCASTS
If you are sitting in traffic and listening to Z100, you are truly missing out on some REAL advances for your NOGIN. I’m telling you, just taking in new information that is fresh and relevant has been SO critical in my development over the past year. I wish I would’ve started sooner. Sometimes they give examples or tips that change the way I think or live. I love Stuff You Should Know, The Skinny Confidential Him and Her Podcast, and The Tim Farriss Show.
FIVE: EXPERIMENT. EVALUATE. EXPERIENCE. EARN. ENJOY.
I have only arrived at where I am because of these 5 key factors. I experimented with jobs, boys, apartments, cars, tools, and more. I took time to evaluate these choices and then made sure to make better ones the next time. I gained experience in as many areas as possible. I earned my keep, my place, or my title in whatever job or accomplishment I had. AND then I finally began to truly enjoy life. I also fill my life with things that I love and enjoy now.
I would challenge you to really reflect on the things that are making you miserable verses the beautiful wonders that give you JOY.
SIX: FIND YOUR FAITH.
Trevor can take full credit for me returning to church regularly. As soon as Griffin died, I completely lost it. I lost my faith and I lost my desire to attend (much less get involved) at church. Although Trevor and I had a few speed bumps finding a church community that was loving, accepting, and my style… we finally found it at Imago Dei! Having a place to center myself and get my mind set for the week ahead has been critical to my growth these past few years.
SEVEN: TAKE AN L
There is nothing like losing to push you to get ahead. Man, when I left finance behind I had to READJUST like no other. I took a small part time job to pay the basic bills and then I had to start hustling. At the end of the year I made just as much money as my salary would’ve been in finance… which I feel is an accomplishment. Being an entrepreneur is not easy! BUT when you are truly living on the edge, figuring out just how you’ll pay your bills each month with random gigs… you get real creative, real fast.
EIGHT: START A SIDE HUSTLE
Short and sweet: Everyone should do this. Not only are there some good tax benefits (DM me for more info), but it will challenge you to think differently and outside of the corporate box you’re probably in. Start your own thing, do Essential Oils, Mary Kay, Monat, LipSense, Brewing Beer, etc. Anything that you’re interested in, just try it! AND: extra mulaaa for you, amiright?
NINE: SET GOALS
Ahhhhh. So cringethat this is one of my tips. But it is honestly SO true. This year I set a goal to read ONE book by the end of every month… so randomly, throughout the month, I have a point of reference and I keep reminding myself that there is a deadline. This helps me stick to things so much. If you want to diet, get on DietBet or have a goal with your friend. If you want to hike, put it on your calendar! Put the goals down on paper or in your phone’s notepad. Make it more real. This has helped me SO much.
TEN: GET A MENTOR
Someone who is not your family. Someone who doesn’t start as your friend. Someone who has experience and expertise in something that will truly help you. I have a few of these people. One I meet with semi-regularly, and some I meet with a few times a year. Again, try to add value to their life and stay open to criticism, suggestion, and advisory.
Having a mentor has been KEY in opening up doors in my personal life and career.
ELEVEN: DO WORK YOU ARE PROUD OF
I am the ultimate B-S-er. I will just glaze through an assignment or task as quickly as possible. Sometimes the work is decent, sometimes not. BUT if you want to excel, try to do your best work whenever you can. Go the extra mile. Work on the weekends. Research. Get better. Watch a YouTube video. Make a YouTube video. Do whatever it takes to make great work. Even though every blog I post will not be the greatest piece of writing ever… I still want it to reflect me and my portfolio as best I can. THEN, in whatever your craft may be, you will get better, more efficient, and more advanced in that area.
TWELVE: TAKE RISKS
Plan a trip. Take a gig. Get the web domain. Join a class or take a course.
Improve yourself by putting yourself in tough situations that will help you excel.
THIRTEEN: TAKE TIME TO SMELL THE ROSES
This actually has nothing to do with roses. I’m talking about spending time appreciating, reading, reviewing, and experiencing other’s work. Artwork, film, books, poems, blogs, photos, coffee shops, restaurants. Anything that can help you become more cultured. Take the time to gain an appreciation for the beautiful things in the world around you.
FOURTEEN: SET COFFEE DATES
This one can be with anyone. It’s okay if it’s not an “interesting person” or if it’s over drinks or if it’s your best friend getting pedis. Just make the time to reach out to people and connect. This helps meprocess in healthyways(as I’m an extrovert) and it can help you get out of your shell if you are an introvert!
FIFTEEN: START TO SAVE
Even when I’m REALLY cutting it close with my bills… I still have an automatic pull from my checking into my retirement accounts. Especially now that I’m self-employed, I really need to make up for the opportunity cost of having a corporate job’s retirement savings. The first year I worked I put $10,000 into my 401k. That money will have SO long to grow. Saving into a ROTH can help you save for a down payment on your first house. Saving for a trip builds resilience. Having a rainy day fund is an absolute necessity.
SIXTEEN: USE YOUR RESOURCES
Everyone has some sort of advantage to SOMETHING. Think about what that is. Identify what that is. Use that thing to help you in some way. My mom’s company was the first client I had consistent business from as a content creator. I was able to improve, get better equipment, and really grow from those gigs. Use who you know, what you know, what they know, and really expand with that. It is an absolute MUST.
SEVENTEEN: SURROUND YOURSELF WITH GOOD PEOPLE
This is pretty self explanatory. You are who your friends are, so choose your friends wisely.
EIGHTEEN: FIND YOUR TRIBE
Again, find people that make you want to be better and breath life into you.
NINETEEN: MAKE STRIDES TO BEING HEALTHIER
I learned the hard way folks, I gained A TON OF WEIGHT when I was 19. I lost it over time, but WOW, I had to really adjust how I think, eat, exercise, and live. Little choices every day will ultimately bring you SUCH a reward in the end.
TWENTY: WRITE CARDS
If you really can’t get yourself to write a handwritten note, then email or text them, but there truly is NOTHING like getting a handwritten note in the mail. I make sure to take the time to thank the people who do things for me. It instills confidence in the recipient that they spent their time and resources wisely and it was not taken for granted.
TWENTY ONE: CREATE
Make something. Do a craft. Make a video. Write. This freedom and challenge has propelled me into some of my best work.
TWENTY TWO: START TO INVEST
Invest in the market. Invest in your friends. Invest in quality things and take care of them. Invest in yourself, your health, your mind. Do it! It will all pay off.
TWENTY THREE: DEVELOP YOUR BRAND
Even if you’re not a blogger or influencer, when you start to identify what makes you YOU, everything changes. When I’m buying clothes, I look at it and think “is this me?”, because I know that if I can’t say “yes”, then I’ll NEVER wear it more than one time. Knowing who you are helps you make good choices about what you will do, buy, experience, and be.
TWENTY FOUR: DIE EMPTY
Leave your best work out in the world. Make sure that you leave a mark. Do your best to give your all in everything you do.
TWENTY FIVE: DO YOU, BOO
Before you take something on, ask: is this ME? Is this going to give me life? Health? Happiness? Beauty? Fulfillment? AND make it YOU. All you.
You. Do. You.
Hopefully you found this helpful!
Cheers to 26!
Xo
Chelsea
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