How to Avoid a Mid-Life Crisis When You turn 30

I can list off a few people who will have a mental breakdown when they turn 30.

Not because they’re crazy, and not because they haven’t accomplished anything… simply because their whole life they grew up thinking that they would be at a different place than they are when they get there. They thought they’d be a successful business woman, have a family, have purchased their first home, or be famous, who knows.  There is something in their blood that thought they would have “made it”… and then they get there and POOF! They realize it never happened.

There is nothing worse that feeling like you’ve missed out on the opportunity to make yourself into something great.  I’ve got news for you, if you’re reading this, and you feel these emotions coming on.  30 is just a number, and someone else’s timeline does not have to be your own.

If you had already “made it”, where would you go from there?

Would you be happy if you had everything you ever wanted? 

For my own life, I want to give my best and build my life, body of work, relationships, etc. the best I can, so I can look back at 30 and say…I am proud of the life I’ve lived so far.

The saddest thing I see is people with extreme amounts of talent wither away because they can’t get their shit together.  Year after year they just wander around, making little progress and they can’t seem to nail down what their “thing” is.  This isn’t a “the cream rises to the top” kind of scenario.  These people truly do have the most amazing gifts, they just can’t get themselves in a straight line to get ahead and make progress. 

Today I want to chat about specific best practices to make sure that when you reach 30 (or whatever that magical scary number is for you), you are not only proud, but you can look back and say “I worked hard, was constantly moving toward my goals, and I couldn’t have done anything more than I did to make my dreams happen.”  Isn’t that all we can ask for?  Above just “doing our best.”  Above just the meeting of “luck and opportunity.”  The principle that YOU not only can take control of your life, but you are the only one who is going to make you and your talents a success.

In the past year, I’ve done dozens of things that I had always wanted to do. 

I went into the recording studio and made a music video that involved sets, a choreographer, a Ferrari, and all my best friends.

I started a new line of services for Urban Bay and now those are what pays my bills.

I launched a blog and started to put the things that I’ve learned onto paper.

The things that I started to accomplish this last year have been so important for me and my peace of mind. 

What are the things that YOU KNOW you will regret NOT DOING when you get to 30? 

If you want to sell your paintings, start that Instagram. Start reaching out to people, reading books, framing them, etc.

If you want to go to France, start funneling money to someone you trust (like your mom or your grandpa) and then tell them not to give anything back to you until you have 5K and can go on the trip.

Start implementing practices where you can truly move the needle. 

Even if you move the needle a little, you can wipe the word “REGRET” out of your vocabulary.

Some other practices I’ve seen help so many is to INVOLVE OTHER PEOPLE.  If you don’t know how to do something; ask, seek, learn.  Stop scrolling Instagram in awe, start making actual moves.  Write down a list of things that you think would get you to the next step.  Even if you do one of them, you are moving forward.

There is nothing better than knowing you did everything in your power to be the best possible version of yourself. 

Don’t let those negatives feelings and vibes get you down.

I went through a lot from age 19-22 and I will always feel like I missed out on getting a head start on all the things that I’ve always wanted to do.  I can’t let that sentiment hold me back any longer.  The best time to have planted a tree is 20 years ago, the second best time is today.

No matter what age may scare you… YOU are in charge of the next month, year, decade of your life. 

How will you make it count?

Hope you’re having a wonderful Tuesday, friends.

xo

Photos by @RachelCossette with @RachelCossettePhoto at Prince Coffee in North Portland.